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Review written by: Alex Sandell


A boy trying to explain to his giant why the best film
of the decade spent its opening weekend going virtually
unnoticed by the movie going public.

What's the story?

In the paranoid 1950's, a time when a "commie" was hiding behind every corner, and a bomb shelter was hidden on every block, Hogarth Hughes (voiced by Eli Marienthal) discovers the ultimate secret . . . a huge iron giant with a heart made out of gold.   

So how is it? (Get to the point, already)

The Iron Giant is, without a doubt, the best movie of the decade, and the best animated film ever made.   This is the movie you hope to see each time you exchange your hard earned cash for a ragged ticket stub.  This is that illusive film that people occasionally whisper about, but no one believes actually exists.  This is the film that invigorates you, makes you laugh, makes you cry and makes you happy to be alive.  This is the movie that makes you forget it's a movie.  This is the motion picture that is actually magic.  

The Iron Giant takes you away from the world you live in for 80 minutes, and has you hoping you never have to go back.  It doesn't so much make you feel like a kid again; rather than make you feel like the kid you always wanted to be. 

The Iron Giant transported me.  It was a spiritual experience that I haven't felt in a theater since I was a young lad with a big bucket of popcorn and head full of dreams inspired by watching E.T., Indiana Jones or the original Star Wars.  17 years later, The Iron Giant let me grab hold of those dreams, goals and fantasies in the same way that I did when I was 10. 

For 80 minutes, I wasn't the jaded, bitter, 20-something who was thousands of dollars in debt, recently dumped by "the love of my life," and, more likely than not, the guy who is going to have to move back in with his parents at the same time most of his friends are becoming parents themselves. I was the perpetually happy kid who believed he could do anything, once he was "big" enough to reach for the stars.  For 80 minutes, The Iron Giant let me escape from myself and become someone else.  If that isn't magic, what is?

What does it make you feel like eating?

Twinkies and loads of whipped-cream.

What are you selling us here???

The best animated film ever dreamed of. 

If it won an Oscar, what would it be?

"BEST PICTURE OF THE 1990'S" - The Iron Giant

On a scale of 1-10?

10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Agree? Disagree? Wanna have cyber-sex? Email me at alex@juicycerebellum.com 

Text (Copyright) 1999 Alex Sandell [All Rights Reserved]. If you copy this, without my permission, I'll sick The Iron Giant on you, and he definitely has a few tricks up his "sleeve!"

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