(Read this update straight through before clicking any of the links, or the whole "flow" thing will be sorta off.)

What I REALLY want for my birthday is . . .

A doctor with a brain.

A corporation with a heart.

A Christian Coalition member with a soul.

A porn star without implants.

A baby without tears.

A mother with an "off" switch.

A 12-pack of beer with no hangover.

A citizen of France with a pleasant attitude.

A Michael Jackson with pigmentation.

A brain that doesn't give me seizures.

A world without the death penalty.

A girlfriend that doesn't cheat.

A head without an ache.

A computer that never goes obsolete.

A mayor that is nice.

A good Star Wars prequel.

A candidate to concede.

A person as generous as Enid.

A cure for a dog's bad kidneys.

A new Super Juicy Topless Girl.

A lawyer that really IS only thinking of my best interests.

A collection agency to get off my back.

A homeless person to feel worthy.

A refund for the movie I never watched.

A response from Toys R Us.

A good writing job.

A "out-of-business" sign on every McDonald's.

A lot of feedback on this update.

A patch for every broken heart.

A chance to tell my grandfather that I loved him.

A family that doesn't fight.

A friend that doesn't falter.

A good eight hours sleep.

Ralph Nader for President,


John Lennon alive.

"You say you want a revolution, well, you know,
we all want to change the world."
-John Lennon
October 9th, 1940 - December 8th, 1980

Everything but the picture and the quote is 2000 Alex Sandell [All Rights Reserved].  Copy this without my permission and the other thing I'll want for my birthday is your head on a fucking platter.

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