Bubba Dorkweiner
Takes on 20
Letters to the Webmaster
(and doesn't understand one of them)

A note frum Bubba: This iz actuuly the secind instillmant of wat Alex cals "The Most Massive Email Update EVER!" (I reely wunder if he wil evar lurn how too spel.) The furst was by Charles Lee Conservative. Toomarrow, the stoopid guy finilly gits awf his sowry butt, and duz sum of the werk 4 himsalf. Todaa, I, Bubba, anser yoor queshtons and mails.

Dear Webmaster-
Okay, I've been thinking about it.  And I want you to adopt me.  I'm 15 years old, and would love to have a crazy guy like you for a guardian.  So, what do ya think?

-Adam

Im naught crazee. Wat do yoo meen "adopt"? I dont like big werds. The ownlee big werd I no is "equivocate", and thats cuz my momma taut mee it, cuz she sed things wood do that too me threwowt life.

Dear Webmaster-
How did i not know about this place (The Juicy Cerebellum) before????  It's halarious!!!! and me, being the totally insane person i am, fits in perfectly!!  Good work buddy :)
-Sue

At leest yoo spelt "halarious" rite. Yoosooly, peepel by mistace say "hilarious". Momma alweez sed I wuz "won of tha good wons". She wuz a smart ladee, wen she wuzent drunk.

Dear Webmaster-
Please teach me some fun new things to do with my boobs, I'm afraid I've been taking them for granted.
-Sylestra

Alex sez that he wants too handel this won.

Dear Webmaster-
Hey! I went to the juicycerebellum page... it's kickin' the spiz!
-Pumpy

Ar yoo a blak persin?

Dear Webmaster-
you are crazy but not as crazy as me!
see ya

-Kathy Kasprick

Alex wantid me too pointe owt that yoo hav the werd "prick" in yoor last name. I dont no y he is so intirasted in triviel things like that. Ar yoo a blak persin?

Dear Webmaster-
i checked out that site. Kinda cool, kinda wierd but over all awsome LOL :) catch you later
-Amber

Yoo meen my site "bubba's fun with guns", or Alexs site that is cawled "The Joocy Sarabellem"? What site do yoo meen? I downt no any site cawled "that". At leest yoo spelt "awsome" rite, thow.

Dear Bubba-
u r funnee.
-Bubbette

He-haw! I maid this lettar up. He-haw!

Dear Webmaster-
I love your site, I have been a fan of it for months now.  I have it bookmarked and check it every day, I cant go without my Juicy updates!
-Salli

I hav a gun.

Dear Webmaster-
I really like your site, however I must say I am offended by your
remark about Hasbro/Kenner.  I LOVE My Little Pony & lots of other toys
Hasbro made in the 80s, plus a few they make now.  I do say that more
than 100 of us on the Internet collect My Little Pony.  We certainly do
not think they are 'piles of plastic junk'!!! My Little Pony 4 EVER!
-MLP Mum

I agre! I haight anywon hoo wood make fun of a ponee! Thay are so versetile. Yoo can ride on thare bak, or "ride" on thare "bak" if yoo no wut I meen. ;) (Daddee tawt mee that.)

Dear Webmaster-
Yeah, you are the sick puppy with the site, well, you should be congratulated.  The short time I had to check it out showed me that all is not lost.  There is someone out there listening....good job.

-Michael J. Rollins

I hav a gun. AND Im in tha NBA! Yoo can reed moor abowt me at my paige bubba's fun with guns!

Dear Webmaster-
If I ever get dumped by my booyfriend...marry me. I'm real pretty, and I'm
legal ;)

Amanda Benjamin

Ar yoo reel? Ar yoo askin' me??? I half to go tend too the ponee now . . .

These 11 letters are all that Bubba sent me. He claims his "ponee" was "sick," and he had to give it some "jooce." He then asked if I was "blak."
-Alex

Hey! Reading other people's mail makes me feel all dirty inside, and I kinda like it. Send me to The original letter section (updated 4/14/98!), the Letter Archive or the Letter Archive II, or maybe even the Letter archive III, and I might wanna check out the Letter Archive IV. WOW!!! When I'm done with those, there's even MORE letters! Read what happened on 4/8/98 when the conservative, no-mind, Charles Lee Conservative, took on some Juicy letters!

You got something important to say (or something completely stupid)? Send email to: alex@juicycerebellum.com

You know the routine, just click it.