Dead Dogs Don't Roll Over
Written by: Alex Sandell
"One of us meddling kids?" I ask, "theres more?" The dog looks completely uncomfortable, and then disappears. "Typical," I think to myself, as I walk up the rest of the staircase, and open the door leading into the casino. The first thing I see is a load of peanuts flying at me. As I look back up from my flinch, I see Jenny, the incredible human peanut . . . one of the most beautiful girls in the world. I rub my eyes. This isnt the incredible human peanut that I know; this is the Jenny from years before. The one spoke about in lustful whispers, outside in the dark, as you wait for the shuttle. "How could it be?" People whisper amongst themselves, eyes scanning the area, making sure shes not standing in the shadows. "What could have happened to her, anyway?"
Here she is, directly in front of me, and shes not holding any peanuts. Shes not fat. Theres no chocolate coating drooling out of the sides of her lips. Theres just a girl that nearly rivals Sue in her beauty. "Wheres your peanuts?" I ask. "I hate peanuts," Jenny responds, in a voice seductive enough to make me grow halfway erect. "You made those few words sound like poetry," I say, as I walk back toward my bank, feeling like a complete imbecile. Jenny giggles, its eerily similar to the giggles that come from her psychotic self in the future, after her great aunt dies of pork chop poisoning.
"Dont be embarrassed," Jenny says, as I arrive at my bank, "it was sweet." I turn thirteen shades of red. I cant believe the incredible human peanut is turning me on. "Are you new here?" Jenny asks, "Ive never seen you before." "Well," I return, a bit facetiously, "Im new to this area." "Oh," she says, as I begin loading my belt up with change, "where did you work before?" I try coming up with an answer, as I lock up my bank. "Um . . . I used to work in the back." This seems to please Jenny, and she changes the subject.
"Youre kinda the nervous type, arent you?" She asks. "Well," I lie, while trying to make my voice sound calm, "not really." "Cmon," Jenny says, "I can read people. Somethings really bothering you. Its like youre not entirely here." "You wouldnt believe me if I told you" I return, as I walk toward a change light thats glowing from years before.
"Try me," Jenny kindly commands, as I turn off the customers light, and ask what he needs. The customer responds with a, "I need you to quit talking to your little girlfriend here, and do your job, buddy." I smile. Its comforting to know that the prick might actually be dead, as we speak. "Sorry, I say what do you need?" "Give me two-hundred dollars in dollar tokens." I look confused, and this asshole in front of me picks up on it, immediately. "What? You dont haaaave it?" "Um," I return, "this is the nickel area, you would have to go to high stakes to get that kind of change." Like an angel, Jenny intervenes, and hands the man the change. "My friend is new here, and doesnt quite know his way around. Here you go, sir." "Thanks, missy," the man says, before giving me a dirty sneer, and turning back toward his addiction.
"What the hell is going on?" I ask. "Were in the high stakes section," Jenny responds, in a pleasant voice, before stopping to ask my name. "Wayne," I say, sort of embarrassed over my name, as always. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYNE!!!" Jenny screams, throwing another bunch of peanuts into my face. The incredible human peanut is back. Overweight, annoying, and totally nuts (in more ways than one). "Hey, Jenny," I return, depressed to see what a few years, and a big tragedy can do to a person.
I look around and Im back in the nickel section, in my own timeline. Although it should be a relief, it actually feels kind of sad. Its not as though Ive really accomplished anything in my life, and maybe Im doing better in some other world. Maybe Im dating the nice, sexy Jenny of yesteryear. Then again, maybe Im dead. I think Michael J. Fox did a lot better than this.
I look back toward Jenny, and shes not even there. Disappeared. In her place is a frantic Richard, running toward me at the speed of light. "What are you doing?" His trademark words melt their way into my weary brain. "Im working," is all I can come up with. "Why arent you checking on high stakes?" He asks. "Bonnies in high stakes," I reply. "Bonnies in the hospital, giving birth," Richard responds, sardonically.
"Shes giving birth, NOW?!?" I half ask, half demand. "Of course she is," Richard replies. "But, its too soon." "Too soon for what?" Richard asks. "Oh," I slowly respond, trying to keep track of timelines, and making sure that I dont screw up again, "I dont know. I just thought she wasnt due for another month." "Well, shes due," Richard replies, "its that time."
I nearly start crying; it all happened too fast. I cant believe "that time" is already here. I take a deep breath, preparing myself to ask Richard if I can run to the bathroom. This has got to be the most terrifying moment in my life. Suicide doesnt give you time to come back, and in a few minutes, it looks like thats where Im going.
. . . All on the word of a dead dog.
Go to: Chapter 57
©1997 Alex Sandell but, if you're a book publisher and, you wanna get this puppy out, please get in touch with me, hand me a nice, big contract and, of course, a 12 pack of Grape Soda and maybe we can do lunch.
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