Three in the Morning
Posted:
03/06/08
Hillary
had this one coming for her fear-mongering "3 in the Morning" red
telephone advertisement she scared the poop out of gullible dummies in
Texas and Ohio by airing. Written, directed, narrated and edited by
yours truly. This, my friends, is reality. Watch.
Enjoy. And rate it 5 stars, alright? Click for
video>>>
Hillary Clinton and the Mainstream Media Back in Bizarro World
Posted:
03/03/08
"The Clinton crew
made their permanent residence in Bizarro World long before they
transplanted themselves to New York. Hillary's latest bizarre attempt
at gaining credibility has been to claim the media has been unfair to
her. The very same media who has continued to treat her either as an
underdog or as a front runner (whichever best suited her purposes) even
after losing 11 in a row. Being
in Bizarro together no one in the MSM points out the irony of Hillary
getting free airtime on David Letterman, Saturday Night Live, 60
Minutes and The Daily Show all within a 5 day period leading up to
"Junior Super Tuesday" (Texas, Ohio, Rhode Island and Vermont). Using
these valuable media moments the media has given her for free to point
out how unfair the media is toward her." Click for full editorial>>>
The Case for Barack Obama; Hillary and the Smell of Mothballs
Posted:
02/01/08
"As
a United States
Senator,
Hillary Clinton has been a rubber stamp for George W. (Pre-emptive War
in Iraq, 2001 Bankruptcy Bill, designating the Iranian National Guard
as a Terrorist Organization) in much the same
way her husband played rubber-stamp to Newt Gingrich and his
conservative cronies (WTO, Contract for America, Welfare Reform).
Senator Barack Obama pushes us forward without forgetting the past and
he's not playing as anyone's stamp -- rubber or otherwise.
Senator Obama belongs as much to the future as he does to the
PRE-Clinton
Democratic party. The great party that left so many feeling proud and
helped
so many more achieve their dreams. The party of JFK and FDR. This
should not be forgotten and the politics of hope truly need to replace
the politics of cynicism and fear that have ruled over the U.S. for
decades." Click for full review>>>
In Honor of My Mother and the Power of Love
Essay Posted:
01/29/08
"My mother, Miriam A. Solomon, died on January
20, which happened to be the seventh anniversary of the inauguration of a man
and a presidential regime that she loathed. Once, several years ago, when
I referred to George W. Bush as 'an idiot,' she made a correction
by pointing out he's much worse than that; she used the
adjective 'evil.'" Click for full essay>>>
There Will Be Blood
Review Posted:
01/22/08
There Will Be Blood is
one of those movies that's just good enough to make you wish it were
better. Overall I liked the movie, but I wanted to love it. And I did
until the screenplay got lazy and pulled a "17 years later" type stunt
that was uncharacteristic of the deliberately paced, honest and
compelling story that preceded it. At over 2 and a half hours There Will
Be Blood was still too short. Why? Click for full review>>>
Run,
Republican, Run!
Posted:
01/17/08
I
haven't posted a video in a LONG time. So, to make up for lost time I'm
posting two (one today and one tomorrow). This one uses the Nintendo
Wii's "Check Mii Out" channel to figure out whether the next President
of the United States will be a Republican or a Democrat. And you
thought the Wii was "last-gen." Could a last-gen console pick the
President? Exactly. Click. Watch.
Enjoy. And rate it 5 stars, alright? That isn't too much to ask for
free entertainment, is it? Anyway, have fun! Click for
video>>>
Anybody But
Hillary
Posted:
01/09/08

Bill Clinton did more damage to the Democratic Party than any
Republican ever could. He made the party corporate. He got the party to
pass NAFTA (which is why your job's in Mexico) and the WTO (which is
why your child's sucking on a toy made with lead paint). He lost
millions of Americans their jobs. He gutted what Reagan had left of the
regulatory agencies that kept Americans safe from things like toys with
lead paint. He did nothing good for this country. The economy would
have
boomed with or without him -- it was the Internet,
stupid! When that bubble burst the illusion of Bill making us better
off should have burst along with it, but the public is ill-informed.
George W. Bush was no better. But Hillary Clinton will be no better
than George W. Bush. And if you believe anything else you deserve the
Clinton you get. Neither Bill or Hillary are Democrats. They run as
Democrats, but in their heart of hearts they are Conservative
Republicans.
Jesus, people -- look at their voting records! It isn't too hard to
figure out
who they truly represent. Click for full
article>>>
Shoot 'em Up
Review
Posted: 01/04/08

You know what I
hate? The fact
that this gem of an action movie failed at the box-office. If you count
the singularly excellent experience that is Grindhouse
as two separate movies (and the fucking Weinstein Company certainly
does) -- that makes the three greatest, most irreverent thrillrides of
2007 complete financial duds. What are you people paying to see,
anyway? Spider-Man
3?!? Shoot
'Em Up would fit in perfectly with Grindhouse. It may
be even more over-the-top than the two main features in that
film. It's
more like those classic fake trailers found in the Tarantino/Rodriguez
masterpiece.
Think Machete
and you'll have some idea of what you're in for with this movie (if you
missed the Machete
trailer that was included with Grindhouse,
you can still check it out on the Planet
Terror DVD). This
is a balls-to-the-wall, explosion of gun-porn that's so crazy it could
get the testosterone pumping in a corpse. It's a man, a carrot, a baby
in a bullet-proof vest,
a thousand dead bodies, a million guns and a billion bullets. And oh,
is it ever fun ... Click for
full review>>>
Alien vs.
Predator: Requiem
Review Posted: 01/03/08
It would be nearly impossible to
make a movie with an Alien and a
Predator fighting suck. But somehow Paul W.S. Anderson managed to do
the impossible and create a PG-13 train wreck of a film with his 2004
original. Defying all odds, The Brothers Strause (don't ask) have puked
up a movie that's even worse with
Alien vs. Predator: Requiem.
The acting
is laughably bad, the dialog is worse and -- sin of all
sins -- the aliens and predator aren't cool (Predator), scary (Alien)
or both (Aliens).
The only thing this movie gets right is its R rating.
And by the time the film's finished you'll realize how little a rating
matters when the movie itself was created by talentless hacks who
should be taking your order at Burger King before you see the movie,
rather than working on the movie you're about to see. Alien vs. Predator: Requiem
is a franchise-killer. It's not even good
enough to be as bad as a terrible straight-to-video teen slasher such
as, I'll
Always Know What You Did Last Summer. To those just
looking for some
fun action and gore -- look somewhere else. Most of the kills in AVP:R
are ultra-fast or off-screen. A few tiny snips and the film could have
been a PG-13. Even Paul W.S. Anderson's PG-13 AVP abomination left 2 of
the
greatest monsters in sci-fi history with a little bit of dignity
intact. The Brothers Strause, taking a break from making crappy special
FX in crappy movies like Fantastic
4: Rise of the Silver Surfer to instead direct a crappy
movie with crappy special FX, have absolutely no ability to
properly stage or
direct an action or suspense scene; making both creatures look like
B-grade monsters that should be hidden in a Black Lagoon somewhere. Click for full
review>>>
No Country
for Old Men
Review Posted: 01/03/08
No Country for Old Men is
a well-crafted film with some
quirky, funny dialog and that brutal violence that is becoming a Coen
Bros. trademark. Still, when compared to similar Coen output like Fargo and Blood Simple, the
movie is a disappointment. It's far too
close to Blood Simple
for its own good, with the Coen Bros.
rehashing many of the same tricks that worked so well for them in the
past. In a lot of ways the movie is almost a remake of both Fargo and Blood Simple. A
more
meandering version of two superior films. The comedy and
clever dialog that was in Fargo
is nearly non-existent in this one and the suspense -- which does still
manage to work -- isn't as original as it was when it was found in Blood Simple 23
years prior. But what hurts No
Country for Old Men more than anything is its repetitive
nature. That said, there's a lot to
like here.
Click for full
review>>>
Once
Review
Posted: 01/03/08

Show of hands: How many of you
singing the praises of this film (and hopefully you can sing better
than Glen Hansard) are college age,
majoring in liberal arts and building your identities by declaring your
love for this trite, poorly made, low-budget independent film? How many
of you keep your non-"Hollywood" DVDs on display in milk-crates in your
dorm room, as a mating call and status symbol? That's what I thought.
Show of hands: How many people who didn't raise your hands for
the first two questions LOVED this movie?
Or even saw it? No one? That's what I figured.
Horribly shot, horribly lit and filled with mediocre acting and
horrible songs, this is one to avoid. Not only isn't it "the best movie
of 2007" or "one of the best musicals ever made," it's quite possibly
the worst movie to ever receive critical acclaim. I guess what makes this movie
"real" is the shaky hand-held camera. It's like Michael J. Fox forgot
to take his Parkinson's meds and was told to shoot the movie using his
palm as a tripod. Click
for full review>>>
You Are
Alone
Review
Posted: 01/03/08
This movie is every
bit as
depressing as its title implies. It leaves a lingering feeling
of
sadness that even a 12 pack of Guinness beer won't wash away (trust me,
I gave it a shot).
That being said, you may need to suck on a joint or two to smoke away
the film's imperfections. It tries too hard to be poetic with
some of
its dialog occasionally coming off as flowery and fake.
The older guy
in the movie (Buddy) seems a little TOO out of it to be believable for
his age. It
seems more like a teenage girl is explaining her sexuality to an
asexual 70-year-old extra-terrestrial virgin who is only visiting
earth for a day, than it does a teenager explaining her sexual
practices to someone from the planet earth in their late 30s with a
working penis. In the
Internet age, it's pretty hard to believe this guy would be so unaware
of the sexual world around him (unless he's working for Mike Huckabee).
Click
for full review>>>