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You Know Your Favorite Company Turned Multi-National When ...

The "Made in America" label becomes, "Made by some poor kid in Indonesia for 33 cents per hour."

Wal-Mart hangs an American Flag (made in Taiwan) over the product, and requires its non-union employees to salute it, each day.

Tiger Woods wears its easily recognizable logo on his hat, as he putts.

Eminem claims that he's the real "Slim Shady" while touting at least 2 slave-labor items.

Rich company executives quickly sold their stock in the company, a day or two before it plummeted.

Martha Stewart's name is on it.

Nike's Philip Knight cancels million dollar "gifts" to certain universities, if said universities join the Worker Rights Consortium.

George W. Bush throws the first pitch, at the company's ballpark.

George W. Bush has heard of the company.

George W. Bush can spell the company's name correctly.

George W. Bush chokes on a pretzel.

Every worker choosing to go on "strike" suddenly has a "stroke."

Tiger Woods smiles at the camera and says, "strokes can be good."

Eminem uses a curse word.

Britney Spears and Bob Dole appear in a commercial together.

Your "Chicken McNuggets" are only "chicken" in name.

One of the Tyson kids gets caught drunk driving.

Anyone related to Bush tries to fill an illegal prescription.

Fox News claims to be "Fair and Balanced."

Diamonds are a girl's best friend.

Dumb guys become "the new black."

Clear Channel owns 99.9999999999999999% of the radio stations in your neighborhood.

Public Radio is considered radio's only "Liberal" station.

Wal-Mart claims that it broke its "Burma connection," and then goes on to import almost 70 tons of garments from Burma. 

"Anti-trust" becomes "trust me," and Bill Gates turns into a National treasure.

Sweatshops become the new treadmill.

- Written by:  Alex Sandell

Agree?  Disagree?  Want to bring me to court?  Email Alex.

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Copyright 2003 Alex Sandell [All Rights Reserved].  Copy this, without my permission, and I'll sick an International Tribunal on your ass!