Profound Question/Thought/Wonderment of
the Day for the Jiggy Month of June!
Written by: Alex Sandell
June 2nd, 1999
I think we should melt down all the hairspray bottles used back in the "poofy" eighties and build a whole 'nother planet with them called, "Poofy Eighties," and then all those people who get nostalgic for real crappy stuff can go there and stay.
June 3rd, 1999
After thanking God all this time that it's Friday, wouldn't you think he'd at least take a second to give us a brief, "you're welcome," by now?
June 8th, 1999
Sodomy can be beautiful.
June 10th, 1999
Epileptics give better head.
June 12th, 1999
Somehow the universe just won't seem the same without any Bones in it.
June 14th, 1999
I have a butt.
June 17th, 1999
So how long does this fucking "wake" last anyway?
June 18th, 1999
Taking a crap would be gross if you lived in an upside-down world.
June 21st, 1999
I don't like being a strawberry in your thingie.
June 24th, 1999
Sometimes I envy the Robin, because of the way it can shit with great ease.
June 26th, 1999
Little bald men in yellow sunglasses may seem closer than they appear.
June 28th, 1999
If I was a movie, I'd probably be, "The Abyss"
June 29th, 1999
Farts make people laugh, no matter how stinky they are, so I guess they're worth it, even if they are sort of wet, and kind of gross.
June 30th, 1999
Sometimes when a girl gets cold, her nipples get big.
©1999 Alex Sandell [all rights reserved]. Copy it, and I'll get Jiggy whicha!
Prove you're worth your weight in Juice . . . sign up for the Totally Juicy Newsletter, today! Simply send an email with the subject, "hey, some of my best friends are midgets!"
Back to the table of brains