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Cerebellum Reader Top 50
Written by: Alex Sandell
About two weeks ago, I put up my list of "The Fifty Best Movies Ever Made." At the end of the list, I asked you guys to send in your favorites. In response, I received nearly 1,000 emails containing hundreds of movies. Obviously, it took me nearly eternity (well, almost two weeks) to break it all down, add it all up and find out the fifty "favorites." Now, because I wrote this update BEFORE writing its introduction, and I'm getting really tired and my butt fell asleep hours ago, here they are, along with the reasons why I didn't include them with the original fifty, for your viewing pleasure. Please note that they are listed in order of votes, from the most votes to the least. Sorry if this introduction seemed kinda scatter-brained. It's hard to write when your butt is asleep.
*NOTE: I did NOT include any of the movies that have already been listed in "The Fifty Best Movies Ever Made" update. That way you have 100 movies to rent. Yippee! (Yes, I have viewed "The Phantom Menace" one too many times.)
Pulp Fiction (received 67 votes)
This movie almost made the cut in my top 50 list, but was nudged out because it seems to get really bogged down and draggy during the middle. "Fiction" got by far the most reader votes of any sent in. Congratulations, Tarantino lovers!
Reservoir Dogs (received 48 votes)
Maybe I should get in touch with Quentin and tell him he should be advertising on this page. With so many Tarantino fans reading the Cerebellum, I should probably be wearing a bulletproof vest!
The Usual Suspects (received 39 votes)
You guys really like your "guts and gun" stories, don't ya? This should have almost been entered into my top 50 just due to the excellent screenplay, but a screenplay alone a film does not make (GAWD was that nerdy). I always get kinda bored when watching this.
Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas
(received 28 votes)
I've never seen this and the only thing I've heard is that it totally sucks. Obviously, at least 28 people in the world liked it. I'm gonna have to go check it out.
Clerks (received 27 votes)
Two guys and a cash register. Still, the dialogue wasn't quite witty enough to help save the bad acting.
Mallrats (received 25 votes)
A bunch of kids in a mall. Still, the okay acting couldn't save the bad dialogue and horrible script.
Taxi Driver (received 23 votes)
I should just lie and say I saw this one, being that it's considered a classic and I pretty much loose all credibility in the movie world when people realize I haven't even seen 1 second of it, but, honesty is the best policy, except when lying works better, so I have to admit, I haven't seen Taxi Driver. There, I said it! Happy now?
American History X (received
This was a good film, but not in the "Juicy top 50" by any means. I don't think it ever lived up to its potential and all the slo-mo shots of Norton reminded me a bit too much of Rambo in the Regime.
Back to the Future (received 19 votes)
I kind of cheated when I didn't put this one into my top 50. It obviously deserves to be there. It's just that all the product placements (IE - One Big Pepsi Ad) drove me fucking nuts.
Silence of the Lambs (received 18
I did add this to the "Totally Juicy Horror Movies" section of The Juicy Cerebellum. That should suffice, right? I just finished the new sequel (sorry movie lovers, it's only in novel form, so far) in one sitting, if that counts for anything. Give me a break here, you wouldn't want to eat my liver, it's been polluted by thousands of seizure meds. Go after some member of the Catholic League, if you're feeling particularly cannibalistic. Thanks.
The Shawshank Redemption (received 17
This one was actually in the top 50 until I realized I counted wrong and there were actually 51. Something had to go. Unfortunately, at least for the 17 of you who sent in a vote, it was "Shawshank."
The Graduate (received 15 votes)
I would have added this, but it really isn't all that good and Simon and Garfunkel totally, totally suck more than anything ever sucked before or has ever sucked since!
The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
(received 14 votes)
A blowjob, breakup and herpes. Hey, it could happen.
12 Monkeys (received 12 votes)
Good call, "Monkey" fans. This is an EXCELLENT movie with two leading actors that totally suck. That's saying something. (I don't know what, but it must be something.).
Blade Runner (received 12 votes)
I haven't seen this since I was like 14 years old. I hated it then. I have no idea what I'd think of it now. Harrison Ford is groovy.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(received 11 votes)
This was funny . . . once.
Alien (received 11 votes)
The horror scenes in this movie are fucking genius. Too bad the rest of it kind of blows.
Aliens (received 10 votes)
Better than the original. The horror scenes are still bordering on "genius" and this time, there's enough action in-between them to keep you awake.
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned
to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (received 9 votes)
I can never make up my mind on whether I like this or not. It was definitely years ahead of its time, and would have been HILARIOUS at the time it came out, but it seems a little too dated watching it now. For what it was, it's a classic.
Wayne's World (received 9 votes)
EXCELLENT! This is one of the best comedies ever. It always has me wondering what went wrong with "Austin Powers." I didn't add it to the top 50 mostly because there weren't any boobs and I hate heavy metal.
True Romance (received 8 votes)
I didn't put this one in there because it sucks.
A Clockwork Orange (received 8 votes)
I saw this at like 16, and it really disturbed me. I guess that was the point. I haven't seen it since.
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure
(received 7 votes)
The "inspiration" for "Wayne's World." Another classic. Could have used more boobs and less heavy metal, though.
Wayne's World 2 (received 5 votes)
One of those rare sequels that actually lives up to the original. Once again has me wondering what went wrong with "Austin Powers."
Chasing Amy (received 5 votes)
I'm surprised how much worse this one did than "Mallrats" and "Clerks." It was at least as good as "Clerks," with better acting and none of the annoying slapstick crap that was featured in "Mallrats."
This is Spinal Tap (received 4 votes)
Pretty funny, if it's five in the morning and you're really drunk.
Casablanca (received 4 votes)
Always makes me really bored and then puts me to sleep. At least it's better than
Gone With the Wind (received 4 votes)
Classic or not, I really hate this piece of shit.
The Big Lebowski (received 4 votes)
I keep hearing how great it is, but never get around to seeing it. Something about a movie featuring a bunch of people who bowl a whole bunch doesn't really grab me, even if the Coen brothers did make it.
Full Metal Jacket (received 4 votes)
The first half (before they go to war) is fucking amazing. The second half is kind of a big piece of poop.
Pink Floyd: The Wall (received 3
Sorry, I don't do acid.
The Doors (received 3 votes)
Really, I don't.
Heathers (received 3 votes)
One of my favorite teen flicks. Woulda been in my top 50 if my top 50 was like my top 75.
Natural Born Killers (received 3 votes)
I'm pretty shocked this one didn't get more votes, being that "Pulp Fiction," "Reservoir Dogs" and "The Usual Suspects" were right up at the top. The first time this is really a trip (not that I'd know, since I don't do acid), but it gets old fast, and is WAY too long (sort of like this update).
Night of the Living Dead (received 3
I like this movie . . . A LOT! It's also included in the "Totally Juicy Horror Movies" section of The Juicy Cerebellum. Along with "Psycho," and "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre," this film really paved the way for modern horror movies.
Hook (received 3 votes)
I can't BELIEVE 3 people voted for this piece of junk. The downfall of Steven Spielberg, I'd say. I wouldn't even wipe my ass with a videotape containing this movie. I almost pretended to ignore it, just so it wouldn't have to stink up the page.
Strange Days (received 3 votes)
The ad sucked, so I kept avoiding the film. I think I'll probably keep doing that.
Field of Dreams (received 3 votes)
I can't stand Kevin Costner and don't really dig sports, but this is still one hell of a good movie. Definitely in my top 100!
Raising Arizona (received 3 votes)
Too effective at portraying white trash. I couldn't even laugh at it. Well made, though.
Life is Beautiful (received 3 votes)
One of the best films of 1998. This is a heart-wrenching and hilarious look at a very serious subject. I'd recommend it to anyone.
Schindler's List (received 3 votes)
Steven Spielberg's comeback after the miserable "Hook" and mediocre "Jurassic Park." Another one that would definitely make my top 100!
Godfather 2 (received 2 votes)
Pretty damn good movie. Not as fast or flashy as the modern mobster flick, but amazingly crafted and well worth a look. (Didn't I sound "professional," there?)
The Ice Storm (received 2 votes)
Bleak, depressing look at humanity. Not really a fun time at the movies. Pretty decent acting, writing and directing, though.
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
(received 2 votes)
Pretty good. Not "top 50" fare, though. I know some people who think it's the best thing ever put on film. Guess it's a matter of taste.
It's a Wonderful Life (received 2
I nearly added this to my top 50, but then remembered that it's kind of sappy and about an hour too long. Maybe it'll get in my, "Christmas movies to watch when you're depressed, lonely and alone" list this December.
Evil Dead (received 2 votes)
I put the second one in The Fifty Best Movies Ever Made update. Obviously, the first isn't far behind. I just think the acting and Ash both kick a lot more ass in part 2. Both are part of the "Totally Juicy Horror Movies" section of The Juicy Cerebellum!
Apocalypse Now (received 2 votes)
This is another one of those "classics" I don't really care for. The damn thing is boring and far-fetched.
Basketball Diaries (received 2 votes)
I didn't really like this and one of the people who voted for it is fucking nuts.
Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey (received
Not as good as the original, but still pretty amusing, in a dumb sort of way. I still think they should have left it with the title, "Bill and Ted Go To Hell." Woulda been a bigger hit, that way.
Titanic (received 1 vote)
To be honest, I don't give a fuck what anyone has to say, this was a good movie. Not a "top 50" movie, but a good one, nonetheless. I commend the ONE person who had the nerve to send it in as their favorite film (it was a guy, even). Great suspense, okay romance, and unbelievable historically accurate detail on the legendary ship. Along with "LA Confidential," it was my favorite movie of 1997. The rest of you can keep pretending to hate it. This update is over, I'm going to bed.
Click here to view the original "Fifty Best Movies Ever Made" list!
Thanks to EVERYONE who sent in their favorite movies. I'm sorry if your fave didn't make the list. Feel free to bitch me out or send any comments to email@example.com! Thanks again.
I'd like to point out, for the record, that this update WASN'T proofread and all the typos you probably saw weren't meant to be there.
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ęcopyright 1999 alex sandell [all rights reserved]. use this without my permission and i'll steal your vcr and dvd player (you can keep your divx. i don't want the damn thing.)
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